Playing near lightning is bound to get you burned.
Detroit Red Wings fan Zander - or @NyquistSnipe on Twitter - came up with a playful but ill-conceived description of Tampa Bay Lightning supporters Wednesday:
you're ππΌ not ππΌ a ππΌ real ππΌ tampa ππΌ bayππΌ lighting ππΌ fan ππΌ unless ππΌ you've ππΌ been ππΌ struck ππΌ by ππΌ actual ππΌ lighting
The Lightning replied Thursday with the ultimate comeback:
@NYQUISTSNIPE you're ππΌ not ππΌ a ππΌ real ππΌ tampa ππΌ bay ππΌ lightning ππΌ fan ππΌ unless ππΌ you ππΌ can ππΌ spell ππΌ lightning ππΌ correctly
β Tampa Bay Lightning (@TBLightning) July 14, 2016
Zander actually posted an entire series of tweets about various NHL teams with the same clapping emojis, but only one of them was deserving of a thunderous response.
WINNIPEG - Winnipeg Jets have signed forwards Joel Armia and Adam Lowry on two-year, one-way contracts.
Armia's contract carries an annual average value of US$925,000 while Lowry's is at $1.125 million.
Armia, 23, had four goals and six as...
Armia's deal carries and AAV of $925,000, while Lowry's is worth $1.125 million annually. Both players are 23 years old.
Armia - drafted 16th overall in 2011 by the Buffalo Sabres - has yet to make his mark in the NHL, but suited up in a career-high 43 games for the Jets last season, recording 10 points.
Lowry endured a slight decline is production last season, registering 17 points in 74 games compared to a career-high 23 points in 2014-15.
Both players should slot into the Jets' bottom six, behind a heavily talented core at the top.
When the season was on the line for the St. Louis Blues, they turned to 31-year-old veteran goaltender Brian Elliott.
Now, after being eliminated one game short of a 2016 Stanley Cup final appearance, they're putting their faith in a much you...
Analytics consultant Matt Pfeffer may have lost his job for trying to talk the Montreal Canadiens out of trading P.K. Subban.
Pfeffer made a passionate presentation to the club's brass in an effort to convince them not to make the deal that sent the star defenseman to the Nashville Predators for Shea Weber, a source told Sportsnet's Eric Engels on Wednesday.
Pfeffer's insistence on the subject might have led to his dismissal, the source said, adding that when general manager Marc Bergevin ignored Pfeffer's advice, it reinforced the idea that the GM was using other criteria to judge the players.
Canadiens senior management reached out Thursday to Engels to say they are "very committed to analytics" and will be bolstering that department, reiterating the club's response to his initial report of the club parting ways with Pfeffer.
The longtime analytics specialist, who formerly assisted the San Jose Sharks and Hockey Canada, was reportedly informed Wednesday that his contract with the Canadiens would not be renewed.
The club told Engels on Thursday it's in the process of figuring out who to add to the analytics department.
Terms of the deal have not been disclosed by the team, but General Fanager reports the contract carries an AAV of $1.8 million.
The 27-year-old pivot has spent the last three seasons with the Red Wings, notching a career-high 21 points in 81 games last season.
Detroit also inked Darren Helm, 29, to a five-year extension this offseason.
Before extending Glendening's contract, Detroit had just over $3 million in cap space, with restricted free agents Danny Dekeyser and Petr Mrazek still to be signed.
The Boston Bruins have signed defenseman Joe Morrow to a one-year contract worth $800,000, and also confirmed Wednesday's report of reaching a two-year, $2-million deal with blue-liner Colin Miller, the club announced Thursday.
Morrow appeared in 33 games for the Bruins last season, registering one goal and six assists.
Miller, meanwhile, was a restricted free agent and signed a one-way deal, likely meaning increased ice time for the 23-year-old.
In 42 games with Boston, Miller recorded three goals and 13 assists.
Are the Boston Bruins shopping David Krejci? Will Jimmy Vesey sign with them? Will the Anaheim Ducks trade Cam Fowler? Read on for the latest. BRUINS Β SI.COM: Allan Muir recently said he doesn’t buy into the buzz claiming Boston Bruins center David Krejci could be trade bait. One factor is Krejci’s contract, as he’s entering […]